I miss You

I was sitting alone at a table when the words ‘I miss You’ stumbled out of my mouth. 

It happens on occasion to me, without prompting. 

It’s to God. 

Most of the time, I believe He’s real.  

I remember when I always believed He was real. 

But sometimes I don’t like the way the earth moves, the injustice, or even the outcome of my own decisions.  

And I wonder if He’s there. If He really cares. 

And I’ll sit in silence, a brief silence in between all the noise around me... not outside noises but the noise of podcasts on 2x, music, books on tape, apps, and anything else that distracts me from momentary silence. 

And when I can actually just breathe for a second, ‘I miss you’ spills out.  

I think God is there. In the silence. And it’s actually my soul speaking.