faith and doubt

I grew up in a context where these ideas were opposed to one another.  

But as I’ve gotten older, not by age, but by life experience, these two have become intermixed.  

I moved from doubt being the opposite of faith to doubt being the epitome of faith.

When I look through the Scriptures, I don’t see people with tremendous faith every step of the way. I see people with great doubts and great faith.  They live together.  

Abraham sleeps with his servant, not believing God’s promise.  Job laments being born.  John the Baptist baptizes Jesus but then questions if He’s the Messiah. Jesus cries out to God for ‘forsaking Him.’  

Faith is more nuanced than literal.

Someone who doubts isn’t necessarily a pessimist. And one with great faith isn’t necessarily an optimist.  

One with great faith, doesn’t live without doubt but carries questions with them while they persevere to the other end.